If The Beatles Had Been Computer Buffs . . .
If the Beatles had been computer buffs, some of their songs might have had different lyrics . . .

 

YESTERDAY

Yesterday, all those backups seemed a waste of pay;
Now my database has gone away,
Oh I believe in yesterday.

Suddenly, there's not half the files there used to be,
There's a milestone hanging over me
The system crashed so suddenly.

I pushed something wrong,
What it was I could not say.
Now all my data's gone,
and I long for yesterday-ay-ay-ay.

Yesterday, the need for back-ups seemed so far away;
I knew my data was all here to stay,
Now I believe in yesterday.

 

ELEANOR RIGBY

Eleanor Rigby, sits at the keyboard and waits for a line on the screen:
Lives in a dream.
Waits for a signal finding some code that will make the machine do some more:
What is it for?

All the lonely users, where do they all come from?
All the lonely users, why does it take so long?

Guru MacKenzie, typing the lines of a program that no one will run:
Isn't it fun?
Look at him working, munching some chips as he waits for the code to compile:
It takes a while ...

All the lonely users, where do they all come from?
All the lonely users, why does it take so long?

Eleanor Rigby, crashes the system and loses six hours of work:
Feels like a jerk.
Guru MacKenzie, wiping the crumbs off the keys as he types in the code:
Nothing will load.

All the lonely users, where do they all come from?
All the lonely users, why does it take so long?

 

UNIX MAN (Nowhere Man)

He's a real UNIX Man,
Sitting in his UNIX LAN,
Making all his UNIX plans for nobody.

Knows the blocksize from du(1),
Cares not where /dev/null goes to,
Isn't he a bit like you and me?

UNIX Man, please listen(2),
My lpd(8) is missin',
UNIX Man, the wo-o-o-orld is at(1) your command.

He's as wise as he can be,
Uses lex and yacc and C,
UNIX Man, can you help me at all?

UNIX Man, don't worry,
Test with time(1), don't hurry,
UNIX Man, the new kernel boots, just like you had planned.

He's a real UNIX Man,
Sitting in his UNIX LAN,
Making all his UNIX plans for nobody ...
Making all his UNIX plans for nobody ...
Making all his UNIX plans for nobody.

 

WRITE IN C ("Let it Be")

When I find my code in tons of trouble,
Friends and colleagues come to me,
Speaking words of wisdom: "Write in C."

As the deadline fast approaches,
And bugs are all that I can see,
Somewhere, someone whispers: "Write in C."

Write in C, write in C, write in C, oh write in C.
LOGO's dead and buried: write in C.

I used to write a lot of FORTRAN,
For science it worked flawlessly;
Try using it for graphics! write in C.

If you've just spent nearly thirty hours,
Debugging some assembly,
Soon you will be glad to - write in C.

Write in C, write in C, write in C, yeah, write in C.
BASIC's not the answer: write in C.

Write in C, write in C, write in C, oh write in C.
Pascal won't quite cut it: write in C.

(Author unknown)

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