Lyrics
(Mantle Pieces)

The Lyrics to these songs are given on this page (below)
1) Scullery
2) Not Waving - Drowning!
3) Are You Really Interested?
4) A Sad Cliché
5) To An Air Hostess
6)   All Modern Conveniences
7)   Wayward
8)   Screen Test
9)   For Debbie And Her Friends
10) Tea Cosy



SCULLERY

You're my picture by Picasso
Lighting up our scullery
With your pans and pots and hot-plates
You'd brighten up any gallery.

I could paint a different picture
Leafy lanes and flower scenes
But amid your cooking mixture
You still have ingredients that make you shine
And when you take your apron off I know you're mine.

You're my photogenic model
From the glossy magazine
In among your kitchen structure
Soapy water, washing machine.

I could take a different picture
Rolling hills and flowing gowns
But amid the foaming texture
Dirty linen isn't all that starts to shine
In rubber gloves and faded jeans you still look fine.

INSTRUMENTAL

I could paint a different picture
Leafy lanes and flower scenes
But amid your cooking mixture
You still have ingredients that make you shine
And when you take your apron off I know you're mine.

You're my picture by Picasso
Lighting up our scullery
With your pans and pots and hot-plates
You'd brighten up any gallery.

      ********************

NOT WAVING, DROWNING

You get the wrong impression of me
You think I would not miss you if you did not come
It's obvious you don't see clearly
'Cause if you did you'd see how all at sea I am.

Now if you took a careful look
You might just see the horizon and me
And if you took another look
You might discern - my concern.

I'm not waving I'm drowning
Oh won't you save me?
You are the only one who can
I'm not waving I'm drowning
Why don't you save me?
You are the only one who can.

Though our relationship is sinking
It could be salvaged if we do not lose our head
It would be wrong of you in thinking
It's past recovery, that would be short sighted.

Now if you took a careful look
You might just see the horizon and me
And if you took another look
You might discern - my concern.

I'm not waving I'm drowning
Oh won't you save me?
You are the only - one who can
I'm not waving I'm drowning
Why don't you save me?
You are the only one who can.

I'm not waving I'm drowning
Oh won't you save me?
You are the only - one who can
I'm not waving I'm drowning
Why don't you save me?
You are the only one who can.

(Not waving, drowning)
(Not waving, drowning)
(Not waving, drowning)
(Repeat and fade).

      ********************

ARE YOU REALLY INTERESTED ?

On the table by the window stood the vase with nothing in it
And over by the door was where you cried and felt embarrassed
Then you said something about there being no flowers in it
And I was all confused and you were looking quite your saddest
So come on girl and let me know just what I've got to do
You know I'd rather lose my life than give up loving you
Does everything we talked about now seem irrelevant?
Oh won't you say either way am I the one you want?

Are you really interested? Are you really sure?
Tell me once again, and I won't ask you anymore.

Are you really interested? Are you really sure?
Tell me once again, and I won't ask you anymore.

Do you remember when we could not find our way?
It was unimportant then unlike it is today
'Cause all that mattered was the way you smiled at me
And I was sure of you 'cause you were sure of me
So come on girl and let me know just what I mean to you
Are you sincere? do you still hear me like you used to do?
Come on girl make up your mind I'd really like to know
Are we all spent or permanent? do you stay or do you go?

Are you really interested? Are you really sure?
Tell me once again, and I won't ask you anymore.

Are you really interested? Are you really sure?
Tell me once again, and I won't ask you anymore.

      ********************

A SAD CLICHÉ

She's causing a commotion it's a curious thing
Everyone thought she was a delicate thing
And now they're making her learn the hard way
Say, what's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?

They're dragging her through courtrooms with tears on her face
She cries out for help from God in disgrace
But all she gets is the chairman of the bench
Mentioning background, and would it not benefit all if she went . .

INSTRUMENTAL

She comes from a family who seem unaware
That we're a nation of Christians love and money to share
And we have the best education system today
Say, what's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?

"We simply cannot tolerate this sort of behaviour in the community"
"Young people have more opportunities today than ever before, I really think ..."
"You have to be taught a lesson"
"You do not seem to understand, we're trying to help"
"In view of the circumstances we are going to send you to a detention centre
for six months, it is for your own good you understand".

      ********************

TO AN AIR HOSTESS

The engines roared
The aeroplane soared
And I waited with baited breath for the worst
But everything connected
There was nothing unexpected
Until she appeared looking calm and collected.

I fell in love with an air-hostess
Together we flew the skies with 'Air France'
I wanted to give her a copy of my record
But I did not have the self-confidence.

I fell from such a great height
And wonder if I will ever land.

INSTRUMENTAL

I fell in love with an air-hostess
Together we flew the skies with 'Air France'
I wanted to give her a copy of my record
But I did not have the self-confidence.

I fell from such a great height
And wonder if I will ever land.

(He fell in love with an air-hostess
Together they flew the skies with 'Air France'
He wanted to give her a copy of his record
But he did not have the self-confidence).

(He fell in love with an air-hostess
Together they flew the skies with 'Air France'
He wanted to give her a copy of his record
But he did not have the self-confidence).

      ********************

ALL MODERN CONVENIENCES

Old fashioned she might be
Dated like last year's pop-song
Ageing like this year's calendar
It's a wonder she can still raise a smile.

But in spite of her pension
Governments and Ascension Day
She can.

Her local vicar serves her "pie in the sky"
While her M. P. talks about the policy for European entry
In jargon she does not understand
She's not interested
She makes do, she says she's happy
Talking of her late husband
Who looks down from the mantlepiece
She says she's happy
Says she's happy
Says she's happy
Oh she says she's happy.

INSTRUMENTAL

She likes her television
'Crossroads', 'Coronation Street'
And Robin Day's bow tie
She likes the quiz shows
Where people win a lot of money
And that makes sense to her
She likes to listen to the radio
Music, Clifford T., She says he's nice
He's flattered.

Birth, marriage, death
She needs the local newspaper
Derek writes what she likes to read
But they're knocking down her house now
To build some more
Knocking down her house now
To build some more.

She can read about it on the front page
Or buy the same plot with new bricks
For ten thousand pounds
Central heating, separate dining room
Detached garage
All modern conveniences.

      ********************

WAYWARD

Wayward I think you are
This time you've gone a little bit too far
Just look what you've done to me
I know an' you know
That it's just not funny.

In front of everyone you struck the wrong note
Sit down girl you're rocking the boat
But just for once won't you open your eyes
Take a look at yourself won't you realise - realise?!

Wayward - yes you are
This time you've gone a little bit too far
Something in the way you smile
Makes me wonder is it all worthwhile.

In front of everyone you struck the wrong note
Sit down girl you're rockin' the boat
But just for once won't you open your eyes
Take a look at yourself won't you realise - realise?!

Wayward - yes you are
This time you've gone a little bit too far
Wayward - yes you are
This time you've gone a little bit too far
(Repeat and fade).

      ********************

SCREEN TEST

"I want - to be - a big - big star"
"I want - to be - a big - big star"

The girl by the back-cloth is smoking her head off
While waiting for her turn to shine
While under the heat of the lights come and meet
The big men who could make her big time.

Oh there's such a lot of distance between
Her first audition and making the screen
Well she might do well
Or even excel
But somehow more likely they'll shatter her dream.

She has a lot to learn
And I hope she learns
For there's such a strong attraction
There's a fundamental reason
Which explains her action.

"I want - to be - a big - big star"
"I want - to be - a big - big star"

Well you must admire her conviction and fire
Let's hope it's sufficiently well lit
With all her devices avoiding the vices
Would seem an impossible skit.

Oh there's such a lot of distance between
Her first audition and making the screen
Well she might do well
Or even excel
But somehow more likely they'll shatter her dream.

She has a lot to learn
And I hope she learns
For there's such a strong attraction
There's a fundamental reason
Which explains her action.

"Alright Charlie, who've we got next?"
"Why not try the chick with the long hair?"
"Yeah! She, er she could be right
Why don't you have her up on the stage
And get her to do a few things?"

{PORTIA}
The quality of mercy is not strain'd;
It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven
Upon the place beneath.
It is twice blest:
It blesseth him that gives and him that takes.
'Tis mightiest in the mightiest; it becomes
The throned monarch better than his crown;
His sceptre shows the force of temporal power,
The attribute to awe and majesty,
Wherein doth sit the dread and fear of kings;
But mercy is above this sceptred sway,
It is enthroned in the hearts of kings,
It is an attribute to God himself;
And earthly power doth then show likest God's
When mercy seasons justice.

      ********************

FOR DEBBIE AND HER FRIENDS

Growing up can be a lot of fun
Learning how to walk, and dance, and run
I know someone very special, she takes such care
Tell me what it's like in your wheel-chair.

You have learned to watch the others play
Joining in your stationary way
In your little world of stillness what do you dream?
Tell me where you go, how does it seem?

You have taught me more
Than any book I've ever read
And now I find
That I refer to you instead.

You ask me if I believe in God
I say he's someone I'm not sure of
Then you say that's silly of me - he must be there
Tell me what it's like in your wheel-chair
Tell me what it's like in your wheel-chair.

      ********************

TEA COSY

I love the way you sound excited
When we speak together on the phone
You say how much the kids do miss me
And how you hope I will soon be home.

Well ev'rything I do I do because I love you so
It may not be apparent to you but I'm sure you know
Oh, oh, oh, ho
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

I love the way you write your letters
And explain the garden's overgrown
You list a thousand jobs that wait for me
And is it lonely on your own?

You say you keep yourself to yourself and I do the same
Well maybe just occasionally we could entertain
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

Though it's a long way
From me - to you
You seem so very close
Is it the same - for you?

The future's looking very rosy
Just as long as you will wait for me
Then ev'rything could be tea cosy
And that's how we'd like it to be.

Copyright © 2001 Michael Armitage

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